5 Key ‘House Rules’ for a more harmonious house share

House share rules for harmonious sharing

From all the conversations we have had with people sharing, there is one topic that often gets mentioned by those sharing successfully – people who live in harmonious house shares and consider themselves lucky to live with the other person. They all talk about setting the ground rules early on – and letting their housemates know what is important to them.

One of the great things about not being in your 20s anymore is that you know so much better what you like and dislike. Do you prefer your kitchen to be neat and tidy before going to bed? How much time do you need to yourself each day? Lots of little things we often don’t even think about until we realise someone else has completely different habits to us – and irritates us or at least makes us feel a little uncomfortable.

That is why we think it is important to talk about our preferences and little niggles in advance of moving in with someone, and ideally already when selecting your new housemate. Like in any other relationship there will for sure be differences – but you want to feel at ease and most of all at home in our new house share!

Here is a selection of questions to ask yourself and future housemates – paired with a bit of advice from successful sharers:


1. Socialising & Me time

Especially now that many people work from home on a daily basis, how do you want to spend the rest of you day, by yourself or socialising over a glass of wine or a shared meal? How much time do you need to yourself each day to feel content?

If your idea of socialising differs, consider spending time together in the same space without having to talk or interact with each other all the time. It is proof of a trusting relationship if you can just quietly enjoy each other’s company and feel at ease.

Agree upfront what extent of social distancing you want to practice, both inside and outside the home, so each of you feels comfortable and safe.

2. Daily habits

Do you like to get up at the crack of dawn or are you more of a night owl? What are the things you enjoy doing most, on a daily or weekly basis? Do you like to have the music on in the background? Whatever it might be that makes your day enjoyable and is important to you, let your future housemates know in advance. A house share should never make you sacrifice things for others to the extent that you are giving up something you enjoy. Of course there will be a certain amount of compromise – but it shouldn’t be so big that you are starting to feel resentful. So be upfront!

3. Cleanliness

The obvious one – and an easy one to bring up. Whether you like your home to be spotless or you are not too bothered by a heap of dirty dishes in the sink … check how aligned your views are around cleaning and tidiness. If you can agree on a regular cleaning schedule and don’t actually mind doing it – great. However, if cleaning is something you are worried about (and many people naturally are when starting to share) then our advice would be to hire a professional cleaner right from the start. Costs are minimal compared to your rent, and it can avoid so many arguments and resentment in a shared home. Plus, we think we’ve all earned a little ‘luxury’ over the years 😉

4. Having guests

Will you be having friends or family staying over from time to time? Will someone’s partner be staying with you regularly? Manage each other’s expectations in this area so it doesn’t come as a surprise. In case you are buddying up with someone and looking for a property together it might be worth finding a place with a spare room, even if it’s small.

5. Sharing expenses

Apart from monthly bills which might already be included in your rent, discuss how you want to share food and other household bills. What seems to work for a lot of successful house shares is to split the cost of standard household and grocery items but to each pay for their little ‘luxury goods’, like a nice bottle of wine or expensive chocolates.


Hopefully this selection will help to define your own preferences more easily, and then communicate them to your potential housemates. Log into your profile to add more information about yourself and what you are looking for. Remember it’s all about finding like-minded people to make your home feel like home!

Add your own questions to the list and let us know your advice for a successful sharing experience. We always love to hear from you!


Register to receive our newsletter. You can manage and cancel your preferences in Account.

Latest posts

Treasured friends found in lockdown

There is evidence of many positive house sharing experiences from lockdown. What did we learn that we will take forward…

House sharing is affordable housing

Is affordable housing just a question of assessing the cost of construction, including land costs, building and profit margin, or…

Modern ways of living

Lucille decided to move in with her daughter, son in law and 2 grandchildren, so she could spend more time…